what do you call this? jealousy? no way, its definitely not jealousy. i knw wht jealousy feels like, nd its nt th same as this. sometimes i just feel like saying, dnt ask me! dnt tell me if you knw, because i dnt wnt t knw.

sometimes, i just feel like a bloody extra. there, i said it. i feel like a bloody spare tire okay? yeah, i knw sometimes you need someone t talk to. you trust me, and yes, i trust you too. i love you lots. bt sometimes? i just cnt do it. i'll smile nd feel excited fr you, bt still feel left out. do you understand? i think nt. and you, i dnt knw whts wrong. its nt th same w you anymore. i miss last time.

okay. i'll get t th point. bottom line, im hurt.

and you just wonder, who will be there to catch you when you fall. Dont write me off just yet,10:15 PM decided t post some pics cherry nd i took tht time when i went over t her house. haha. even though they were taken 6 months ago. OH WELL, i like them (:

yogurt!(:














confidantes<3
















camwhores(:



















our cosy family(:














taken at our fav place w th bright lights(:














in her room(:















sean and me! such a sweetie pie! ((:















breakfast at macs(:
















haha. there's still like many more. bt im kinda lazy. anyway. a last image fr you guys t view. enjoy(:

















































its always sad when stuff like tht happens. no?
haha.
<33 ALLY; Dont write me off just yet,7:11 PM &im ruining myself because of you
i bleed t remind myself im still alive
i shut myself out because you wouldnt understand anyway
i say im alright because its th only thing i can say
i pretend tht im strong because nobody wld care if im weak
i give fake smiles because you cant tell th difference
i dont cry in front of you
because you've already stopped caring.
&&im ruining myself because of you; Dont write me off just yet,4:36 PM its days like these tht i really detest. nobody, just me, my book, and th music. normally, i would love t curl up alone and enjoy th book. bt now? th sense of loneliness just hits me hard. and its raining too, i hate it when it rains. makes everything look so dark and deary. /:

dnt worry twin. i still love you(: Dont write me off just yet,4:14 PM we went towning today. ly, shu, liz n me. haha. we had fun. deathnote was dumb, bt i think deathnote2 will be exciting(:

from today onwards, alyssa will..

try to use less vulgarities
OR not use them at all
try to stop drinking so much
OR not drink at all
try to be nicer to her sister
OR just ignore her to avoid scrapes
try to be more hardworking
OR, i really duno. ;p
try to be more gracious with words
OR just learn to keep her mouth shut.

ETC LAAA.
alyssa shall try her very very best to be a nice girl
not that she isnt already one
(:

<33 ALLY; Dont write me off just yet,9:23 PM life on the highway
its no cliche
i see you dying baby
behind that strong face
and i cant save you baby
you seem so far away
and it hits us so strong
hits us so hard
but we cant brush away
the call of its heart
im making no sense
and its hard to think straight
but im nothing without you baby
you know my smiles are all fake
im stuck here again
neither past nor the present
but all i want
is for you to hold me again
im not going to push myself
not making the effort to hold on
when im tired now
i'll take a break
since you've left
and the pain still ebbs
i'll turn and leave too
and you'll find the old me gone
cos time has passed
and people change
and i'll never be what i was again
so let me go
and i'll take my stride
go your way
and i'll go mine. Dont write me off just yet,4:49 PM whats up w wanting pple man
either you want them, and they dont want you
or they want you, and you dont want them

or you want them, and they want you,
bt you knw tht it'd be wrong t have them.

eww. tht kinda sucks. Dont write me off just yet,4:16 PM three's a crowd isnt it?
i get it.

i miss sch so much, it was th only thing tht was holding me up.
i need belle&cherry.
i miss you darlings/:

honey i miss having you so much.
but im never gg back t those days ever again.
i'll just have to live without you(: Dont write me off just yet,11:13 AM okay, so here are th pics w took today(:



















there you go! i cnt be bothered t upload th rest. haha. ((:










Dont write me off just yet,5:25 PM went kboxing w my sis this morning. realised tht we havent been spending much time tgt, so booked a day out. had fun, just th two of us(: yups. had lots of fun. singing. eating. haha. took pics. upload them later fr you guys t view(:

gg t ahyi's hse later fr dinner. yay! cn get my earpiece back. hahas. i need new clothes(:




out of all th pple i dated, you're th one i felt th most fr
and nw you tell me tht your feelings are back
hw am i suppose t react?
bt you're still w HER.
how cn you still tell me tht?
its dumb fr me t tell you t break up w her t be w me.
im nt tht kind of bitch.
morever, she's my friend.
i knw you're a flirt
and i knw you cheat too
you cheated on me
and i knw hw tht feels okay
im nt gg t do tht to her.
i admit, im all about you.
bt thts nt th way t do things.
i wont do tht.
it'd hurt her, you KNOW tht
and so do i.

so thats that. Dont write me off just yet,3:47 PM dad's acting like an asshole now. wth. i duno wth is wrong w you. bt dont take it out on me man.

CHERRY! darling! i cnt believe you're leaving. im gg t miss you/: i rather not have hawt friends and have you, its true. whts th use of hawt friends if i dnt have one like you? /: you have t keep contact okay. you're my best confidante for always. i'd fall apart w/o you. i love you girl -waterysmile- (:

why's everybody leaving? Dont write me off just yet,8:34 PM last day of sch today! was rather mixed. haha. happy bt at th same time sad. hahas. gt bck report book ,wasnt as terrible as i thought it would be. anyway whtever it is, its like OVER ALREADY so like HAHA. yeah. work harder next year(:

after sch went t ps w ly, shu n jane. didnt do much. walked arnd. then went home. hahas.

ive gt smth t say here okay. all those fuckers tht went t spam my sister's blog right, im telling you right nw, if you have smth t say t me, come and say it t my face, dnt you dare go bother my sister okay. and you are nobody t criticize my relationship w my sister, so wht if we quarrel or tht i bitch abt her sometimes? she still my sister and i love her okay, you just shut our bloody mouth up and go curl up somewhere and die.

and, whtever i do is NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS. so wht if i meet my friends outside school? is it a crime? i think not. and its most certainly NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS. dnt you dare g bothering my sister, which you cnt rely, cos she's alr blocked you(: and she deleted those posts so i dnt knw exactly wht you said. bt if you really have t knw, i tell almost everything t my sister, so you dnt have t bitch abt me t her like tht. cos she knws everything already. YOU LOSERS.

haha. just if you'd like t knw, even though i bitch abt my sis alot, and she bitches abt me all th time too, we're actually like, very nice t each other. like, we're gg out fr lunch n fr karaoke tmr tgt. so yeah. SUCKS T YOU. HAHA. if i find out who you are, we're gg t have lots of fun (:

WATCH OUT BITCHES(:

anyway, lets nt end this post on a sour note. im gna miss all you 2/6ers! haha. 2/6 was really such an awesome class this year. rmb all th prizes and competitions we won tgt? yeahh. we really rocked. i love you darlings!((:

<33 ally; Dont write me off just yet,6:10 PM goodbye to you
thts goodbye to smth tht i loved.

why hold on when its gg t hurt?
LET GO.

so i'll turn around and leave; Dont write me off just yet,8:14 PM today was a rather tedious day. didnt slp well last night, so was super tired. had spot check in th morning. thank god i pushed up my fringe when i heard th word SPOTCHECK. haha. so didnt get caught fr anything. bt miss ramlah told me t pull up my socks REALLY HIGH even thou th logo was visible. and she accused me of folding my socks and even made me take my shoes off fr her t see. they werent folded. HAH! ((:

after tht had a meeting w miss j tan at th music room. we're gg t watch a production cos we were perfoming in clash, and still have $20 in our duno wht fund. hehe. YAY! (: after tht had salsa. partnered w kellsie. haha. was fun, bt kinda tiring. and embarrasing. bt yeah. (:

lots of pple didnt come todayy. shushu's in msia, and STUPID SHITE didnt come cos shu nt coming /: lots of others in class didnt come too. bea, ramya ETC. haha. i missed you guys! /: yups. after tht had like recess. and ipp. it was kinda fun actually. sealed up th whole class. then we all sat on th floor. simin, belle n i made so much noise laughing and stuff tht miss ramlah scolded us. HAHA. bt it ended quite fast laa really. took a little nap too. (:

after sch was interhouse games. goshh. was crazy laa pls. raining and whtever. we just sat there in th rain waiting fr it t start until they announced tht we had t play later when th rain ceased. so went back in. half an hr we went out bt it started raining almost immediately again. sat down there waiting arnd, gt a little wet, and went back in.

fr th last time we went out, FINALLY gt t play. thought it was rather unfair cos they initially said tht if we didnt have house shirt we wldnt be allowed t play. bt more than half th gage brown pple didnt wear! bet they wldnt have won if th peeps didnt bend th rules. TOLLEY SLD BE COMMENDED. WE ALL HAD OUR HOUSE SHIRTS((: we played against cooke and lost/: was kinda saddening laa. haha. didnt even knw th freaking rules. bt had fun i guess. NEVERMIND TOLLEY! NEXT YEAR OKAY? NOW WE KNW TH FRIGGING NETBALL RULES!((: haha. tolley still rocks(:

talked t jiahui fr a while at th gate. gt t drink some of her COKE. haha. niceee. geraldine's whole face and ears went PINK. haha. was kinda funny. afterwards we just sat arnd being lame. talking and stuff. it started raining again. and nobody cared, just sitting down there, some tlaking some playing. till it got really heavy then all started filing back t school. crapped arnd, went t dry our hair and stuff cos we like completely drenched.

then so stupid .we ran out of sch t meet jiahui. gt completely drenched AGAIN. right after i dried my hair/: and we kept running out. my red tolley shirt became like wht? MAROON. hahas. yeahh. anyway, after tht mdm yow asked me, kellsie, geraldine n kellice t help her WIPE TH TROPHIES. and told us t go t th general office t get changed. haha. we ran all th way under th rain frm th canteen t th general office. PURPOSELY. haha. and mdm yow had NO IDEA. she still told kellice " aiyoo. your friends ah, so stupid. run across in th rain? they cld have gone by th shelter wht". lols. funny laa.

hahas. yeahh. after tht dad came t fetch me, dropped jane off at th bus stop. came home. hurry had a bath. washed my clothes. haha. felt so good after all tht COLD WATER. my whole shirt and shorts and everything inside were ALL WET. so like yahh. haha. and my sb turned PINK because of th tolley tshirt. haha. then ate dinner. was like SO DAMN HUNGRY. cos didnt eat anything except fr one bite of nic's burger, jiahui's COKE n a mouthful of fruit punch, courtesy of leanne. hahas.

ANYWAY. tmr's th last day of school. thts really really really really sad. i hope i dont cry. im gg t miss 2/6! you guys were such darlings. and THE CLIQUE, and all my darlings. baby! im gna miss you!

AND AND AND .im very tired nw. tatas peeps(:

<33 ally; Dont write me off just yet,7:24 PM ohh th sad lonely little souls
its all th burning desire in their little hearts
to be loved;

lustful lustful desires
th invisible strings tht draw us towards them

&they try t shut others out so they wont feel th pain.



baby, will you love me? Dont write me off just yet,6:53 PM ohh baby, its all about jealousy isnt it?

jealousy jealousy jealousy
envy envy envy

and it all boils down t one thing;
they all want you
heck.
everyone wants you.

lets all break down and cry shall we? Dont write me off just yet,3:18 PM was suppose t go out today. bt some STUPID PPLE cldnt make it. so i cancled out my plans fr gg out altogether. no more mood. STUPID SHITE /:

feel so blank today. i miss my darlings/: everyone is gg out hari raiya-ing. haha. non muslims are hitting town, and WE'RE SITTING AT HOME. perfect isnt it cherry? just you and me(:

haha. cherry cracks me up. chatted w my dear fr like hours earlier today(:
i heard she scores quite well wht
yeah, she's super good at eng
eeyerr. bt i never see her study at all
haha. bt she's clever wht
yeah, whtever, she's always galivanting arnd anyway
alyssa dear, you make her sound like a HORSE!
okay. tht didnt SEEM funny.
bt it WAS.
HAHA.

my dear confidante: dnt dnt dnt dnt dnt, please dnt cry. i love you baby(:

bro: cheer up manzzz. you knw tht i always love you. you're a charmer and you knw it, she's just another person you'll get over(: i love you! ((:

<33 ally; Dont write me off just yet,2:51 PM cut my hair yesterday. regretted nt cutting it shorter, many pple says tht it still looks th same when i tie it up. haha. sch was okay today, bt was really tired cos cldnt sleep last night and didnt rest well.

first 2-3 hours we had t do th cip thingy. was kinda boring. recess was weird w/o jockay. then had like free period. sat around, talking and laughing. fell asleep on th floor w my bag. haha. felt kinda sad looking at everyone laughing and playing cos th sch year is like gg t end in 3 days or so. goshh. im gna miss 2/6 sooooo muchh. and we're all gg t be splitted up next year. its a rather saddening thought man. /:

after tht had cca verification. tht really sucked. they left so many things out. and miss noraidee n miss yeo werent around, so duno when then we cn go change th points. stupid. after school bused t vivio w shushu n ly. had lunch w dad. then went t walk arnd w them.

haha. walked arnd in toysrus. saw pple. AND WE SAW SOMEBODY. nearly had a shock of my life when i saw, clutched ly's arm and told her. haha. we were like freaking out. OMGGGG!! LY!! (((: hahahas. cnt believe laaaa. was so cool((: yups. anyways, we just walked arnd. then met my parents. and went home (:

thts all. cnt believe sch is ending already. goshh.. im gona miss you darlings. who's gona make me smile now? /: Dont write me off just yet,5:40 PM i love you darlings
really really really.

when th going gets tough
wht will th tough do?

WHO KNOWS MAN?
im nt tough.

and you just wonder how long she can take it till she finally breaks down.
fight fight fight
you tell youself t hold on.

goshh.
stop talking to youself alyssa. Dont write me off just yet,4:06 PM th clock ticks
life ebbs
th sad snail slowly creeps towards eternity
what was yesterday is today
and tomorrow will have been.

and i suddenly thought about you
its been so long since we've talked
like wht?
half a year or so?
i even wonder how you are.
i knw tht it was th right choice t leave you
bt i still miss you
i miss how you made me feel so loved

baby, you make it hard to let go. Dont write me off just yet,10:52 AM rest of th results today. one word; ouch.

talked t kor today. poor thing, he's all stressed up over his O's. HAHA. im nt worried fr him thou, silly smart ass(: gg back t th same topic. its weird hw i used t be th one bugging him t go t church n stuff. and nw its vice-versa. funny hw things become isnt it?

have you been gg t church?
nope.
why not?
no motivation.
wht do you mean no motivation?
no motivation laa.
wht motivation do you need? th only motivation needed has alr been there fr you all th time.
huh? wht?
he hung on th cross and died fr you. isnt tht enough?

ouch. tht really hurt.

IS THERE A GOD?
i screamed tht this afternoon.

immediate regret.

im sorry.im sorry.im sorry.im sorry.im sorry.im sorry.im sorry.im sorry.im sorry.im sorry.im sorry.im sorry.im sorry.im sorry.im sorry.im sorry.im sorry.im sorry.im sorry.im sorry.im sorry.im sorry.im sorry.im sorry.im sorry.im sorry.im sorry.im sorry.im sorry.im sorry.im sorry.im sorry.im sorry.im sorry.im sorry.im sorry.im sorry.im sorry.im sorry.im sorry.im sorry.im sorry.im sorry.im sorry.im sorry.im sorry.im sorry.im sorry.im sorry.im sorry.im sorry.im sorry.im sorry.im sorry.im sorry.im sorry.im sorry.im sorry.im sorry.im sorry.im sorry.im sorry.im sorry.im sorry.im sorry.

i really am
i KNW THERE'S A GOD
you've ALWAYS been there.

im sorry. Dont write me off just yet,6:35 PM results today. maths was pure shite. eng was good. chi n home econs, shown improvements(:

told mum abt th results
you make me sad
thts th first thing she said
it broke my heart
cried all th way home.

im sorry
i really did wht i cld
i cnt even care if i get a maths or nt
i only wanted t please you
i wanted you t be proud of me
i wanted you t have "wht you always wanted"
i just wanted to be wht would make you happy.

its nt like i didnt study my ass off
i did, i really did
i cnt believe you said all those things t me
you're like my mother
how cld you?

you wont care about anything else
its all abt A MATHS
like i dnt really care
if i have it good, if nt i'll work harder
and th other subs dnt matter do they?
it doesnt matter tht im among highest in class fr eng
it doesnt matter tht my chi n he has improve lots
because to you im just a failure
right?
failure.

so like okay
you were fed up
so you'd just leave th house so tht you wldnt have t see my face?
so thts it issit?
bet you'd wnt t have one of those 2/4, 2/3 girls t be your daughter right?
those pple who dnt even have t study n still score all As?
wldnt tht be nice?

well im sorry okay
im nt them
and i dnt think i ever will be
rmb wht you said t me last week?
rmb wht you shouted at me?
ARE YOU STUPID OR WHT?
you knw
maybe thts it
maybe im just stupid
yeahh.

you knw
you make me want t hate you
hate you so much
fr being unreasonable
demanding
pushy
strict
and wht nt
bt you knw tht i cn never hate you
no matter wtf you do t me
cos you're my mother.

i knw you love me?
i knw you do.
bt its hard t feel it you knw?
and it hurts when you just ignore me like tht
remember when i was younger?
you'd scream at me
yell till th neighbours could hear
and beat me till there were scars
bt afterwards when i cried
you'd come and tell me tht you still love me

i rather you do tht
scream at me
rail at me
i dnt care if you beat me t pulp
just dnt do this to me.

im REALLY SORRY MUM
bt its like nth's ever good enough fr you
if i pull up my marks frm c to b,
you'd ask why its nt an a.
if i score an a
you'd ask where's th a plus
when do i really get praise frm you?

i really am
but i really did try my best
but its nt enough is it?

but then
i was never good enough fr you anyway.



just cry and cry and cry. Dont write me off just yet,7:09 PM please
somebody
stop this shite
i cnt take it anymore.

dnt look at me like tht
you think ive gt it all together
bt i dont.
im as lost as anyone out there.

i just dnt like t show it.

something's gt to give Dont write me off just yet,9:23 PM mtv groove today was FUN. desmond was th instructer. after less than two months w/o his training, i feel totally unfit. aching so much nw. wondered how we survived clash days. did we ach as much? im cnt seem t remember tht. haha. anyway. it was super fun. thou rather maluating, and i cnt rmb anything nw (:

after sch walked arnd w belle. went t old nanyang w her, shini n yanru. after tht walked back t sch busstop. met ly,shu n jane. waited so long fr th 174 double decker. waited fr so damn long. gt sick of waiting so we took th normal 174. was so stupid. dropped off at th WRONG BUS STOP w shu. so had t walk t th other one. haha. thanks shu fr walking w me (:

you didnt come t sch today! im worried abt you my dear! please be okay /:

yeahh. results coming back tmr! im sorta like.. EXCITED! bt kinda scared too. HEHE ((:

<33 ally; Dont write me off just yet,5:00 PM body combat was fun. was more like hip hop. bt otherwise, th rest of th day sucked. quarrelled w my parents. many stuff happened. stupid security guard. hope she loses her job. damn busybody. hai until everybody so cham. dnt really wnt t talk abt it.

hate you la. i wonder hw she is nw. hope your mum didnt whack u too badly my dear. you knw tht ur my favourite junior. and we all love you superrr muchh. hang on (:

gave attitude t various pple. im sorry if i did t any of you guys. just nt having a good day. im sorry. it has nth t do w you if i snapped.

im sorry mum and dad. you knw tht i love you /:

help help help.
stop using vulgarties girl.
stop caring abt th shite tht other pple do.
STOP.
why sld u give a shite abt them?
WHY?

there's no reason.

someone stop me please. Dont write me off just yet,7:04 PM went towning today. bt this time w belle n vicky. met belle at th ps bank. swapped bags w her. haha. if was super funny. she looked super mis-matched cos she was wearing berms, bball shoes n t-shirt while carrying my PINK HANDBAG (: haha. i looked normal w her sling bag. haha. cos was jus wearing denim skirt n a top. lols.

after she drew her money we bought th green apple vodka n mini m&ms frm carefour. these weird pple were like staring at us and talking duno wht crap. hahas. then walked frm ps ALL TH WAY T HEEREN. haha. was kinda fun actually. it wasnt as far as i thought. had more weird stares frm pple. reached heeren. walked arnd. went t grafitti t wait fr vicky. bought bubble tea. vicky came, we ate lunch.

after tht we took neos! yay! finally. it feels like years since ive taken. hahas. they turned out pretty nice. shall upload them another time(; then belle abandoned us t watch a movie w her senior. vicky n i walked arnd at cine. sat a pastamania and bought this ice cream thingy t share. like hello. cheated out feelings, it looked SO BIG in th picture bt was acutally super small. hahas.

we walked arnd summore. saw sme sch pple. then we went t burger king. bought ice milo. stoned. took loads of pictures. stayed there fr an hour or so. then belle came back. crapped arnd. took pictures again. haha. went t buy famous amos again. then went t th busstop w vic. took SOMEMORE pics w vic on th bus too. lols. retardedness. talked t belle. chatted almost all th way home (:

tmr is shushu's bday! dnt rely think i cn go out t celebrate w her. ohh well..

HAPPY BIRTHDAY DARLING!
ally loves you!! ((: Dont write me off just yet,8:08 PM PIECE OF SHITE.
all th things happening arnd
swirling like a black cloud round my head
bitching
wth
all this gotta stop
and all th other pple
wrapped up in their own world
they leave you out
ouch.

when cn we really fall apart?
am i th only one in church today feeling so small?
everybody seems so strong
should i play th part again?
so tht they cn see me th way i see them?
or let them see th truth behind this person.

and this is when i ask myself a question;
would th love of jesus be enough to make you stay?

yes yes.
forgive and forget.
God loves them as much as He loves you.

let it go. Dont write me off just yet,2:34 PM went towning w ly, jane n ger yesterday. was fun. haha. saw loads of pple in town. guess everyone's towning nw too (: bt had t wait like ONE HOUR fr them t come.walked arnd. bought tickets. walked summore. no choice bt t watch stay alive ,cos THEY wanted to. i was so freaked out during th damn movie. didnt even watch more than half of it cos i din dare to. haha. bt ger was like so damn calm. staring at th bloody screen fr th whole movie. lols.

after tht ger n i walked arnd. went t watch th fashion show at taka. waited fr ly t come back. went t walk walk a bit. shopped arnd. ly came back. we watched th fashion show again. then decided t go heeren. walked arnd. ly n i managed t find wht we wanted t get (: bought it. went over t cine. bought a drink. walked. then decided t go home.


haha. was gg t meet my mummy at gombak, bt was too lazy too. so went home. shall spend today at home cos huili n ahyi are coming over later ((:

haha. okay. i cnt seem t tag on my ownboard, so shall reply tags here (:

PEARL; haha. thanks dear. good luck t you too! lols. you'll miss being th youngest in sch next year. haha. and you guys always bully us la, we're so nice t you guys man. lols. WHT POUR WATER IS BLESSING?

BELLE; haha. totally agree man. nvm la, they'll find out NEXT YEAR. ((:

CEPHAS; okay okay. sorry lo (:

SHU; haha. yeah. very soon alr. and nw im online and you're nt. haha. I LOVE YOU TOO! (:

SIMIN; haha! i love you jie!! many! ((:

CHERRY; haha. who din knw man? ahhaa. dnt give a shite la. lols. really? gt smth t tell me?! TELL TELL! ((:

CHAI; haha! i will dear! ally loves you! ((:

NATASHA; heyy babe! haha! ally loves you too! ((: Dont write me off just yet,12:37 PM im so fucking pissed
SO DAMN FUCKING PISSED
so yah okay
its YOUR LIFE OKAY?
its YOUR LIFE.
i've gt nth t do w it.

bt i hate it when pple lie t me
just admit it la
do you knw how pissed off i am?
you fucking lie t me bt say tht ur NOT?

so yah OKAY
you cn do WHTEVER YOU LIKE OKAY?

i hate pple t lie to me. Dont write me off just yet,2:19 PM ripped this off belle's blog t do cos im really bored (:

YOU CAN ONLY TYPE ONE WORD!!!NO EXPLANATIONS.

[Yourself:] ally

[Your Lover:] jesus(:

[Your Hair:]long?

[Your Mother:]MUMMY(:

[Your Father:]DADDAYE(:

[Your Favorite Item:]hp

[Your Dream Last Night:]none

[Your Favorite Drink:]icelemontea

[Your Dream Home:]heaven

[The Room You Are In:]study

[Your Pets:]non/:

[What You Are Now:]bored

[Who You Want to be in Ten Years:]myself?

[What You Want to be in Ten Years:]content

[What You're Not:]perfect

[Your Best Friend:]lots

[One of Your Wishlist Items:]newbible

[Your Gender:]female

[The Last Thing You Did:]sleep(:

[What You Are Wearing:]clothes

[Your Favorite Weather:]clouds

[Your Favorite Book:]many

[The Last Thing You Ate:]cookies(:

[Your Life:]crap

[Your Mood:]neutral

[Favorite Magazine:]teenage

[Favorite color:] ORANGE(:

[School:]SMSS

[Song:]many(:



OKAY. so we're NOT gg towning today becos SOMEONE has t g out w her mummy. /: haha. so we have t go tmr or smth. bt dnt like t go out on saturdays pls. SO MANY PPLE. ohh well. shall rot at home today. feel so FREE w/o exams! whee! (: Dont write me off just yet,11:03 AM HAHA. havent been blogging fr a long time. apparently my blog has been very happening lately. yes yes my dear spammers. im a bitch and a bimbo and wht nt. thank you very much. i onli have one thing t say.

EXAMS ARE OVER!

blog again when i have th mood ((: Dont write me off just yet,11:22 PM i need a love
not just any kind of love
i need a love tht i can hold on to
a love tht endures through all th odds
a love tht's gentle and calming when i'm disturbed
a love tht i can fall back on
one tht hold me up
and brings me t th center of my being
t be at peace
because now th "love" we see is shallow and selfish
everybody's seeking love fr just comfort and stability
bt they only feel bitter when "love" fails.
i want more than tht
i want mutal understnading
loving not because th other is perfect bt acceptance of th faults
because thts wht makes th person so uniquely th one you love
love thts not demanding
but only accepting
love thts not just childish infatuation
but real selflessness and intense feelings only felt fr th other person
i want t see wht cnnt be seen
and feel wht has never been heard
its needs t be smth so sacred
tht only th two invovled will understand.

and thts why i refuse t fall in love now
cos its nt real
it never is
not now anyway.




okay. today was pure crap. th haze is irritating me. eyes, nose n throat. ESPECIALLY EYES. their smarting like sme shite. HAHA.

jane said t blog about smth nice abt her. OKAY.

JANE IS NICE (: Dont write me off just yet,10:28 PM okay. im gg t blog about th past 2/3 days now[ including today] ((:

tuesday
had lit test. dnt think i did too well cos i din really knw wht t write. i miss r&j, was so much nicer pls. and i kinda miss miss woo too. she was such a nice teacher. english period was taken up by mrs shum. just crapped arnd when she left. was rather funny. th whole gang went t th toilet. plotted t pretend t be in a fight when we went back t th classroom. theywere actually fooled! nic n ramya were like, ''omg! wht happen? why are they fighting?!".

hahas. i loved this:
jockay: wth! whts ur problem la..
simin: wht me! you are the one..
jockay: pls la! you started it ...
simin leans over and whispers
: aye. this one real or fake ah?
jockay: FAKE ONE LA! you crazy ah?
th two continues t "fight".

hahas. it was really funny. cldnt stop laughing after tht. after sch, went t coro w jerri, aly, cheryl n bella. aly bought bought bubble tea fr us.(: i bought sushi. shared a popiah w jerri. we have th same tastes in popiah! NO CHILLI, NO TUAO GAY, NO CUCUMBER AND NO GARLIC! hahas. aly said tht we sld have jus bought th skin w th sweet sauce. which is SO NT TRUE. there's still veggie and stuff inside there okay! ((:

wednesday
DOTS was rather boring. had maths test. made a careless mistake in my formula /: had recess. english was taken up by mrs shum again. crapped again. did the FIGHT SCENE again. which surprisngly fooled pple AGAIN. hahas. had chi outside th classroom on t floor near th cctv. cos 2e3 students were very late in coming back t class and we didnt wnt t go back into th classroom when they finally came back. hahas. lao shi's nice. hope tht we'll be in his class again next year. or maybe lee lao shi. ((: after tht, went t coro again w cheryl, jerri, aly n bella. bought bubble tea again. talked to th bubble tea aunty. turned out tht th JTEAMPRODUCTIONS guy actually sells syrup to her fr her bubble tea! cldnt stop laughing when we heard tht. din knw tht THT ACTOR actually SELLS SYRUP!

hahas. and he was rely nice too. thou like, rather sissyfied. joked arnd. and did funny things tht made us laugh like asses. he wasnt stuck up at all like some other actors. hahas. after tht just went back t school. waited fr my dad to pick me up. then went home.

today
woke up late cos i turned off my alarm when it rang. was nearly late fr school bt reached there on time. had no mass stretch. went back t class room. slacked. talked crap and laughed w th gang. belle, ger, bea, jockay n jane (: then went t th chaple fr th sec 1 debate. th debators amused us quite a bit. wont say how. thts just mean ;p

later on went back t class. had floorball fr pe! was super fun! we won! bt ger's team gt ONE POINT higher than us overall fr all th weeks. so we onli get a2 while they get a1. SAD RIGHT. hahas. yeahh. bt it was still a lot of fun playing together. our team played against ger's team today. and it was like super competitive, bt fun at the same time. like the whole of THE CLIQUE playing together (:

had maths. gt back test paper. got 12/15 becos of my stupid careless mistake. cld have gt 14 or full marks. OHH WELL. i shall learn frm my mistakes (: recess was okay. english was slacky again. msging, playing, talking ,sleeping n whtever. th whole class din go fr art today. just lazed arnd in th classroom. and nobody even cared. mrs low din even say anything t ask, din even see her.

after school, went t th canteen. ate w jerri n cheryl. studied awhile. then got ready t go home. saw shushu n ly at th busstop. so took 174 w them. had t miss like 6/7 174s before we took th double decker. which was like.. YAHH. felt rather dumb. AND AND. these super nice pple came t confront ly abt smth while we were waiting fr th bus. i thought it was kinda funny. felt rather amused by it really. GO LOOK AT YOURSELF IN TH MIRROR LY! hahas. i think she does tht everyday anyway. lols. but anyway,174 finally came. took t shell. crapped abit. msged. then my bus came. and i went home. YAY!

hahas. these few days have been rather weird.
I GOT T STUDY! MY GOODNESS! TMR IS LIKE CHI EXAM!
and next week everything else.
IM DEAD.

PLEASE HELP ME GOD!!! /: Dont write me off just yet,4:54 PM "I want a moment to be real.
Want to touch things I don't feel.
Want to hold on and feel I belong
.It is not life that weighs you down.
It is how you carry it.
These days - the stars seem out of reach .
But these days - there ain't a ladder on these streets .
These days are fast,
love don't lasts-in this graceless age.
Even innocence has caught the morning train .
And there ain't nobody left but us these days."

ripped this off NATHALIE FERN'S BLOG
bt okay. its nt rely ripping cos tht[up there] is th credits(:
i thought it was pretty cool.
true too (:

blog again tmr abt other stuff (:
<33 ally; Dont write me off just yet,9:35 PM i cnt take it anymore
i really cnt
bt i keep telling myself tht i cn.
is it pointless or wht man?

i need you guys so much now.
i really do.

but you're never there anymore.

fcuk it all. Dont write me off just yet,3:50 PM showtime yesterday was okay. wasnt as fun as th last time, hahas. bt din expect it t be anyway. bt it wasnt too bad. din see nanny macfee. maybe he got sacked. HEH :D. took pics. cheered like hell. no comment on t sec1 cheerleaders. bt i think th sec 2 cheerleaders looked pretty cute (:

school ended pretty quickly today. quite relaxing. stressed out in th morning fr maths test. slacked thru chi w karen. writing arhh liiannsxx notes t each other. hahas.. she's my szb hunniex! ahahas. maths test postphoned t tmr. thank god. recess was rather weird. i dnt knw why. jus felt weird ;p

home econs was fun. made apple pie n cake. both came out good. aditi n i had fun doing it, we rock together man. my lovely home ec partner ((: dnt like apple pie thou. shall give my mum later(: bt th cake is scrummy! :D ih was relaxing. mrs shum went over stuff tht we had t look out fr in exams. like steps on how t answer questions n stuff. and i found out one thing. NICOLETTE GIVES VERY NICE MASSAGES ((: bt mrs shum scolded us fr tht. said tht nic was strangling me. lols. laughed like some shite.

after sch went t th canteen w jerri, aly, cheryl n vithya. studied a little while. seemed like everyone was gg out. belle n simin went ps w their juniors. nic n bea went home. shushu n ly went out w their friends. aly wanted t go t queensway t buy shoes. so we all left super early. like wth.. din wnt t go w aly cos rather far. so went t coro w cheryl n jerri. bought bubble tea without bubbles ;p saw pple tht i din wnt t see. like wth. hahas.. bought sushi.

den went t th bus stop. jerri left. took 67 w cheryl. there was a CONTAIMINATED BOTTLE ON TH SEAT. so i tried nt t sit near it. afterwards it DROPPED and th lady in front of me picked it up and asked me if it was mine! freaked out. hahahas.. its like CONTAIMINATED! and she PICKED IT UP! lols. dropped somewhere near nicon gardens. crossed th road. took 190 home. YEAH.

omg. you're such a bitch you knw? i sorta hate you now. i din even talk t you fr th past few days. which means tht i cnt even quarrel or insult or OFFEND YOU IN ANYWAY. so why are you showing me tht kind of shite faces? like wth. im nt gg t give a shite abt you. whts it worth anyway? BITCH.

i hate bitches dnt you? ((:

nic saw th lines today. i told her tht it was by a cat. she believed. HEHE (: funny how some scars never fade uh? cheryl's such an ass. she did a silly thing today. cnt believe mr goh din see it, blind man. bt it looked damn painful. eeyerr /:




i promised.
i promised tht i wldnt do it again.
bt th scars are still there.
feel so goddamned confused.
WTH IS HAPPENING TO ME?
im torn between living th life i used t lead,
and continuing to live th fcuked up one i am nw.

t first option seems better doesnt it?
bt its nt tht easy t go back.


darn teenage hormones /: Dont write me off just yet,3:18 PM dont ask me t relax
i cnt relax
everything's different now
and we dnt knw how t put it right.
things wont be th same again right?

im nt gg t kid myself. Dont write me off just yet,1:29 PM