woahh.. i am like so tired out.. fu shi-ing my sis frm 7:30a.m till now when i can be sleeping! i so admire myself. lol.. :P awaken by mum. was told to go to sis's room[mummy's bed] to see if she needed anything. frm then on till now.. help her get up.. bring her go here and there.. make brekkie.. blah blahh.. daddy came hme and he wondered why i was so tired.. bleahh.. never think de.. of course tired la! i cld haf been SLEEPING. ughh.. i guess its official. i am now the full time maid of this hse and also full time attendant to my sister. yay.. i am SO GLAD[not].

not that im grumbling la.. i know she needs help. but my goshh.. i need time for myself also kay. she wan to go toilet, like i dont wan to go ahhs? get scolded by mum for not be "sui chuan sui dao". tian ahhs.. im not a robot.. still need to eat sleep go toilet kayy! hahs.. and i need to do my own things too! sad sadd.. :(

hahs.. okayys la. happie happie things. waiting for angela to come pass the guitar to me tonight! yay!! =)) gugu also coming to visit sis. hahs.. somehow outside company is more enjoyable den my own family at times like this. at least THEY cant order me about.

hahs.. tired.. think mayb ive gotta go rest. and see wad the princess needs. chao.

`its not about me. its all about YOU. Dont write me off just yet,7:52 PM woahh. FINALLY got onto a comp! hahs.. i actually survivied TWO WHOLE DAYS without the comp! woots!

i am like SO PISSED. my dad decided to REBOOT the WHOLE computer jus "in case there's virus". which means that ALL my work in it is GONE. yupps. jus gone in the wind like that. ugh! plus, the stupid comp keeps restarting by itself! i so hate my comp! if we EVER buy a new one. i am SO going to smash it up!

hahs.. anyway, thats not wad i wan to talk about. the past few days have been awesome, and since i havent been blogging, i shall write an extra long post to make up for it. =)

well, on sat night. went to visit sis. got a call frm mum, she told me that aunty jasmin and e others were there too. had dinner wif them. wahahs.. went up to see sis again. hahs.. lyn,ni joanne n i went to e playground. hahs.. acted like kids and den went back. mum suggested that i stayed wif them for the night. woo hoo!

hahs.. went hme wif them. played cards till about 12:30. indian poker, big two, speed, stress blah blahh.. hahs.. den finally went to sleep. THE NEXT DAY! sunday! wahahs! got to go to POG! yay! hahs.. it was defintely COOL! met everyone again. hahs.. onli faith wasnt there. sadd. lol. but i rely enjoyed praising God in my favourite way again. singing. jumping. laughing. it was so awesome.

the sermon was super great. it was about WARFAIR. woohoo! i am so excited! learnt loads of things. i feel so REFRESHED. hahs.. press on gal! i can do it man! hahs.. gona get past this test. hahs.. went up for prayer. got a word. recieved the answer i was looking for. thanks jesus! thanks apostle! i know what to do now! =))

melmelmel was there! my gosh! i was so surprised when i saw him at the back at e eend oof the service! hahs.. he changed his hairstyle fromm the last time i saw him! it looked SO COOL! hahs..!

got to know yufen. hahs.. this is e first time ive met her. she's rely sweet. came to comfort me when i was crying. hahs.. thanks yf! =) wished ah gong HAPPY GRANDPARENTS DAY! played wif dominic n nicholas. =D had FUN.

then, went for lunch wif the khoos. after lunch we went to see some flower exhibicient[bleahh.. how to spell?) that pastor joseph was excited abt. hahs.. we werent too ethu abt it but we went anyway. the flowers were okayy la. but i still duno how to appreciate flower formations. hee..! we got to try abit of flower arrangments too. hahs.. din came out too bad i guess!

hahs.. aunty jasmin n lyn went for the flower arrangment competition thingy. while waiting joni and i used joel's fone to take pics. lol..! we kinda filled his whole fone wif US. hahs.. and the pics of the flowers that he took himself. they kinda look nicer in the fone thou. =p

yupps. after that, went back to their hse. took a bath. lazed around, read a book. watched a serial wif them. then dad came to pick me up. went to e hospital to see sis. abit better now. she can walk abit stiffly. she's coming hme todayy.

after the hospital visit, went to ah yi's hse to stay. lazed around at night and den practiced on hui li's guitar. dont think im making much progress, but ohh well. hahs.. im sure i'll get better. ;) chatted for a while wif hamz. played cards wif hui li and den went to bed.

MONDAY

woke up and sat around the hse watching hui li do hse work! lol.. for once its not me! weeheehee.. =p played guitar. den went to e library to return kor' s books. had lunch at macs over there. and we went to play the arcade! hahs.. playing half way, ah yi called! ahhs! hahs.. we ran out of e arcade w/o finishing the game. hee.. cos we werent suppose to be playing.

got out of the arcade. rushed to ntuc to buy stuff for ah yi. by the time we reached hme, my gugu was there alr. chatted for a while. discussed about e psle students blah blahh.. den went to lot1. hahs.. saw a rely nice jeans dress there! but quite expensive. hahs.. decided not to buy till i ask mum cos i wasnt rely sure if i'd wear it often.

went to macs. bought SHAKER FRIES! super nice. hee.. we ate on the car back. =p hahs.. we played SWEET OR SOUR on the way back to ah yi's hse. lol.. super funny. waving to anyone and everyone. sum waved and smiled back, some din. lol.. we mus haf looked like idoits!=p

hmmz.. later wen hui li n i got hme. we jus lazed around.. blah blahh.. wasnt allowed to use e comp. bleahh.. played guitar. watched tv. ate BELGIUM CHOCOLATE! wahahs.. no wonder i always grow fat wen i stay at their hse! too many things to eat! yum! =)) hahs.. mum came.. we talked.. laughed.. blah blahh.. den went to sleep.

woke up alone in the hse this morn cos everyone was out. lazed in bed. chatted wif kor. den later my grandma, ah yi n hui li came hme. i went downstairs to buy brekkie. ate le den watched tv. hahs.. e 5566 game show thingy. super funny. played summore guitar. trying to master the very first part of qing fei de yi. hahs.. still super lan at it but mus practice practice PRACTICE! yea! i can do it man! =))

hahs.. yea. so anyway, todayy was jus watching tv, and playing guitar.. nothing much. had lunch, den mummy and daddy came to pick me up wif sis in the car. went hme. helped mummy do some stuff den begin to pack the clothes cupboard. woahh.. took me 2 hours and i finally got everything nice and pretty. typical of sis, to jus go for the op and let me clear up her mess! hahs.. only have haf one more lil drawer to pack that i'll pack tml. almost done!

yupps.. so thats why now i can finally get onto the comp! =) wuu.. and a good news! angela[mummy's fren a.k.a elysia's sis] said that she wanted to lent me a classical guitar! hahs.. cool right? then i can practice at hme. weeheehee! daddy din approve of me learning guitar but he still let. lalala.. hehe.. angela's coming tml to pass to me. problem is that i din manage to borrow e begginer book frm hui li. mayb ask angela if she haf ba. =))

hahs.. now im super hungry! ohh no.. gona get so fat! hahs.. nothing rely much to say le. blog again tml! chao chao!=))

-shaking it ALL off and STEPPING on it! praising my way out of this well. Dont write me off just yet,9:01 PM jus got hme. super tired lo. jus now at prawny's hse super stress.. bleahh.. eden la.. play me out.. never come.. grace also. tian ahhs.. i was the only girl there. *faints*

at first watch dem play badminton. trying to devise some plan to hurry leave man. super gan ga.. all e guys i also duno derx. onli know shawn n jun hao. ahhs.. i wanted to GO HOME. hahs.. but later was not so bad. it RAINED! wahahas.. HALLELUJAH! so we went upstairs.

slacked.. watched them play comp.. da da da.. eat.. but i din eat much so now im super hungry. =( but there's no food at hme. so mus wait till dinner. *cries* cut cake.. eat cake.. super nice e cake. chocolate one. =))

den later e guys wanted to go play bball. hahs.. i stayed behind n watched cinderella story wif prawn's sis and her frens. hahs.. super nice lo. even thou watch so many time le. but so nice! so romantic! hahs.. that's why its a fairy tale.

tralala.. later going to visit sis. not going to come hme.. sian.. im so hungry.. someone gif me sumthing to eat! =(( Dont write me off just yet,4:45 PM tian ahhs. so tired. slept at about 1a.m last night. woke up at 8. den went back to sleep. lols. dad woke me up at 9a.m. ask me to play piano. hahs.. i went back to sleep. finally dragged myself up at 9:45.

later gotta go shawn's hse. his burrfdae today. ahhs.. sians.. feel so tired ahhs! still mus go.. Zzzzz

HAPPY BURRFDAE PRAWNY! Dont write me off just yet,10:55 AM alyssa's activity programme for 25.11.o5

3:30a.m- finally put down the fone and sleep.

10a.m- roused by my mother's screaming and the vacuum cleaner ["wake up! i want u to help me do thing!]

10:15a.m- wake up drowsy-ly and brush my teeth

10:30a.m- get on my piano and practice

10:40a.m- mum yells: "PLAY PROPERLY!"
i play properly

10:55a.m- mum yells "come help me try the porridge!"
i try the burnt porridge.

11a.m- mum yells "do the christmas tree!"
i go do the christmas tree

11:30a.m- mum yells "REDO!"
i redo the christmas tree

12a.m- i bath

12:15p.m- play piano

12:30p.m- leave to pickup grandma n hui li

12:55p.m- grandma n hui li get in the car

12:55-1:30p.m- listen to grandma tell grandmother stories in the car
we reach the hospital

1:30p.m- hui li and i are told u "get lost"

1:35p.m- we managed to find a source of food [vending machine's maggie mee]

2:00p.m- we finish eating. sit in the room. not allowed to talk to sis. we go to the tv room

2-2:30p.m- we slack in the tv room. go seven eleven.

3p.m- go downstairs to eat wif gm, mum n hl.

3:05p.m- listen to gm nag. get slapped for saying "what the hell"

3:10p.m- sulk alot and roll my eyes while walking down the corridor.

3:15- get pinched for saying "what the??"

3:20- get seriously pissed wif all the nagging and abuses

3:30-4p.m-reach foodcourt. eat. listen to gm nag again.

4p.m- wait for taxi

4:15p.m- taxi comes. get in.

4:15-4:35- listening to gm nagging and asking us whether we told the taxi uncle the right place.

4:435- reach ah yi's hse. get in. slack

4:40- sms kor whether can on the comp or not

4:41- on the comp

tralala.. what a NICE day i had. full of nagging, sulking and me rolling my eyes. going to e hospi but told to shut up and get lost. woohoo.. i had SO MUCH FUN. Dont write me off just yet,4:54 PM
jus got hme. hahs.. had fun. we went to return e cds. ate lunch den go take neoprints! hahs.. super nice lo. put down here for you all to see! hee..! =))

hahs.. nice mahhs? =))

Dont write me off just yet,4:10 PM real tired todayy. chatted one fone wif kor frm 11 to abt 3:30 like tad yest night. tired.. woke up cos the fone rang. TWICE. bleahh..

later at abt 12p.m going to find eden at her hse there. sian.. mus go find her.. feel so lazy! we have to go return the vcd the e shop. den go eat lunch and walk walk. mus be hme by 5 cos going to visit sis.

my sis. she okayy le ba. but yest was very drowsy. still ask me buy the piglet frm minitoons for her. hahs.. see how first ba.. $12:95 leii! im not rich! =p

blog later. chao. Dont write me off just yet,11:28 AM well, here i am again. spent most of the dayy whiling my time away reading fanfic. seriously getting more and more interesting! hahs.. but one e last book of e sequel. sad sadd.. hahs.. but so interesting! hahs..cant get enough of it. hee..!

din play piano today. jus lazed around. din do any hw. im such a notty girl. the onli usefull thing i did was to pack 2 of sis's cupboards and 3 drawers. leaving the other two for tml. bleahh.. yay.. i am so looking forwards to that. [NOT]

chatted wif cher jus now. some stuff that she said rely encouraged me. hahs.. this is kinda exciting. the pillar? hahs.. SO COOL! the second person who told me that! woots! i am so glad. thanks jesus! thankayyes gal! =)) hahs.. home alone. jus delightful. but now, i wish i had a companion. anyone out there?

For He has said "I will never leave you nor forsake you." So we may boldly say " the Lord is my helper. I will not fear. what can man do to me? Hebrews 13:5-6 Dont write me off just yet,8:07 PM HELLO

at last managed to get e comp going! yay! =) there's sumthing seriously wrong wif my comp, keep spoiling! i hate my comp! hahs.. but i love it too. =p yupps. had a nice nice lunch! simple but nice! daddy n mummy made roast pork! super nice, crispy! with potatoe soup and rice. =))

mum and dad jus went to e hospi to see sis. think her op sld be finishing soon. abbt 1p.m ba.. not visiting her today. im going tml. so i'll be alone at hme for the WHOLE DAY. hahs.. and i have the delightful task of packing up sis's clothes cupboard. isnt that lovely? i have to pack it up nicely cos grandma will get a heart attack if she saw the state that it is currently in. bleahh.. i get that lovely job. scary..

had my piano lesson as usual. din go too bad. but i was so tired i din wan to wake up. chatted wif hamz n esther on e fone last night. put down le, still cldnt sleep. so read under e light of my torch until it broke down. bleahh.. stupid thing, jus refused to give me light! laid there sleeplessly until abt 2a.m like tad.. siian.. den had to wake up early.. still kinda tired.. yawn..

`in the midst of all that is happening i still thank u lord

trust in the lord with all ur heart and lean not on your own understanding. in all your ways acknowledge Him and He will direct ur paths. proverbs 3:5,6 Dont write me off just yet,12:51 PM now at ah yi's hse. was bored at e hospi so decided to come here. later dad coming to pick me up. yupps.. finally gona haf peace and quiet at hme tonight. =p

hmmz.. life never fails to surprise me. jus when i tot that everything was so boring and bo liao, everything started happening at once. the good, the bad.. etc. etc. appointments needs to be made, presents to buy, homework to be done, conflicts to solve, people to visit etc. then i think, would i rather be this busy or would i wan to be "free"? hahs.. even i dont know the answer. =p

some stuff havent been going too well again. sometimes its jus so hard. for all of us i guess. sometimes i wonder. why me? why them? why us? hmmz.. think real hard, reflect loads. and i found the answer. cos God has something real big for us. He's going to use us in the many ways that we have and have not imagined. but, we have to pass the tests first.

so many things been happening, and i know that they are all tests. to see how close and bonded
we are to each other. it breaks us, tears us down, and it hurts like hell. but we've got to stay strong. right guys? we cant jus let satan win like that right? please stay together. ye, remember those strings? the strings that some of u guys tied together? even though i didnt see the strings itself, but they meant a lot to me.

sometimes it seems like we're all alone. hasnt everyone felt like that before? im sure that we all have. its a horrible feeling. but i realized that being alone isnt a punishment, rather, its a chance for us to sincerly talk to God. pour out everything to him. to lean my whole being on Him. cos its gona be alright, even if alright doesnt seems to be coming. even if alright doesnt seem possible. even if it seems far.

please guys, we have to stay united kayys? i can almost see satan grinning, as he says "xx[no of pple] down, xx[no of pple] to go". please dont give up! please, lets stay united. it heartwrenching when someone strays away. lets stay together and cont bringing each other up kayy? i love you all. lets not let satan tear us apart.

`stand together Dont write me off just yet,7:35 PM helloooooooooo. back again. hahs.. havent been posting in real detail so shall write a real long post todayy. =))

okayys. since so many peeps been asking me how was my jb hol.. hahs.. let me jus say that i did NOT go there for a hol, onli for a one day visit wif my family okayy? hahs.. and my cousins. had fun there man. bought clothes.. cds etc.etc. hahs.. also bought a new hp pouch. hee.. hello kitty! kinda childish, but super cute! =))

yest went to j8 wif my family and hui li. watched HARRY POTTER!! yay! my goshh. tom felton is SO handsome now!! hahs.. seriously! but there was so little of him in this movie. =( hahs.. but it was rely good! very exciting. onli one part so sadd la, that shuai ge die!! hahs.. tradegy. ithink many pple cried. hahs.. but was sitting in e THRID ROW from the FRONT, so felt a bit giddy. bleahh.. but was SO NICE!! =))

hahs.. after e movie we walk walk abit. look at e xiao yuan superstar contestants. laughed at e funny ones. =p hahs.. ya. not much la. den went for dinner at ikea. hahs.. din know e food there was so nice! hahs.. ate spagetti! wuu..! and e meatballs were super nice! hahs.. we had fun there.

yup. sis jus went to e hospi this morning. later going in to see her. tml is her op. yup. christian frens out there, do help me pray for her kayy? hahs.. looking on e bright side, NOBODY to fight for the comp wif me, NOBODY to ask me to stop talking on e fone at night and NOBODY to fight for e remote control for one whole week! hahs.. kinda cool ehh? thats e nice part.=)

hahs.. ya. okayy la. thats about all i guess. jus gona slack and whatever. wait for mum to cum home den go see sis liao. chaoo. Dont write me off just yet,11:18 AM hahs.. me now at my ah yi's hse. like my new bloggie skin mahhs? hahs.. i think its pretty. =)) yups.. todayy's serm was pretty good. learnt loads of stuff mans. heh.. kinda bored now. hui li go and wan shi zhong. duno where the heck she disappear to. cant reach her on e fone. stupid girl. =p


acceptance

unity

rejoice

maturity

God's lordship

light of eternity

journey of faithfulness

conviction

live free

romans 14:8 - For if we live,we live to the Lord. If we die, we die to the Lord. Therefore whether we live or die, we are the Lord's.

romans 14:18 - For he who serves Christ in these things is acceptable to God and approved by men.

- for the king and His kingdom Dont write me off just yet,4:26 PM why mus u always be like that? making thoughtless remarks. hurtful statements. have you ever thought that you'd hurt me with those words? threatening me with the things that i love? how many times had i wanted to cry over your hurtful threats and remarks?

dont you think that i try? do you think i'm fooling about? do you think that im jus playing? you dont see or know anything that i do. then why do you judge me like that? you dont even want to know. you dont care.

you dont understand

you dont even try Dont write me off just yet,6:06 PM heyy. jus woke up now long ago. feel abit shag. eyelids keep falling but i cant sleep liao. too hot. yest slept late watching full house. hahs.. super funny cann! laugh like crazy. so nice. but mus hurry finish watching by thur so tad i can meet eden den we can both go to return to e cd shop.

yest at ah yi's hse, my second cousin came back to singapore for a visit(she married an american). hahs.. she brought her baby wif her! so cute! she jus reached 10 months and is so adorable! looks like ang mo but has asian eyes! cute! hahs.. and she's named after me! lol.. not exactly la. but same name! alyssa! hee..! adorable! like me! =p

read an e-mail yest. think God was speaking to me again:

The Necklace

The cheerful little girl with bouncy golden curls was almost five.Waiting with her mother at the checkout stand, she saw them, a circle of glistening white pearls in a pink foil box."Oh mommy please, Mommy. Can I have them? Please,Mommy,please?"

Quickly the mother checked the back of the little foil box and then looked back into the pleading blue eyes of her little girl's upturned face. "A dollar ninety-five. That's almost $2.00. If you really want them, I'll think of some extra chores for you and in no time you can save enough money to buy them for yourself. Your birthday's only a week away and you might get another crisp dollar bill from Grandma."

As soon as Jenny got home, she emptied her penny bank and counted out 17 pennies. After dinner, she did more than her share of chores and she went to the neighbor and asked Mrs. McJames if she could pick dandelions for ten cents.

On her birthday, Grandma did give her another new dollar bill and at last she had enough money to buy the necklace. Jenny loved her pearls. They made her feel dressed up and grown up. She wore them everywhere, Sunday school, kindergarten, even to bed The only time she took them off was when she went swimming or had a bubble bath. Mother said if they got wet, they might turn her neck green

Jenny had a very loving daddy and every night when she was ready for bed, he would stop whatever he was doing and come upstairs to read her a story One night as he finished the story, he asked Jenny, "Do you love me?". "Oh yes, daddy. You know that I love you." "Then give me your pearls." "Oh, daddy, not my pearls. But you can have Princess, the white horse from my collection, the one with the pink tail. Remember, Daddy? The one you gave me. She's my very favorite." "That's okay, Honey, daddy loves you. Good night." And he brushed her cheek with a kiss.

About a week later, after the story time, Jenny's daddy asked again, "Do you love me?""Daddy, you know I love you". "Then give me your pearls." "Oh Daddy, not my pearls But you can have my baby doll. The brand new one I got for my birthday. She is beautiful and you can have the yellow blanket that matches her sleeper." "That's okay. Sleep well. God bless you, little one. Daddy loves you." And as always, he brushed her cheek with a gentle kiss

A few nights later when her daddy came in, Jenny was sitting on her bed with her legs crossed Indian style. As he came close, he noticed her chin was trembling and one silent tear rolled down her cheek. "What is it, Jenny? What's the matter?" Jenny didn't say anything but lifted her little hand up to her daddy. And when she opened it, there was her little pearl necklace. With a little quiver, she finally said, "Here, daddy, this is for you."

With tears gathering in his own eyes, Jenny's daddy reached out with one hand to take the dime store necklace, and with the other hand he reached into his pocket and pulled out a blue velvet case with a strand of genuine pearls and gave them to Jenny.

He had them all the time. He was just waiting for her to give up the dime-store stuff so he could give her the genuine treasure. So it is, with our Heavenly Father. He is waiting for us to give up the cheap things in our lives so that he can give us beautiful treasures

Isn't God good? Are you holding onto things that God wants you to let go of? Are you holding on to harmful or unnecessary partners, or relationships that it seems impossible to let go? Sometimes it is so hard to see what is in the other hand but do believe this one thing:

God will never take away something without giving you something better in its place.
___________________________________________

God. what are you trying to tell me? Dont write me off just yet,10:32 AM hellooooooooooooo. me now kinda bored. at my ah yi's hse using comp. heh.. i loev e songs on their comp. hmmz.. duno whether can copy onto a cd or not. but den mus man man go through all the diff files. i dun think i haf the time and energy rely. =p

jus now went out wif eden. hahs.. had a great time. we caught up LOADS. jus talk n talk n talk. hahs.. yup. love being wif her, she doesnt gif me pressure like sum other peeps. =) hahs.. love her. but she keeps making cracks at my "all girls skool". hahs.. but i know tad she's kidding la.

we took neoprint! hahs.. obviously now i cannot scan it up but i'll put it here wen i get hme. hee.. yarpx. we rely talked alot la. i rely miss being wif her. hahs.. we're rely alike rely, like the same things. think alike even. hahs.. mayb tads why we're such good frens.=))

yup. mayb later going to visit ah yi in e hospital. cos she jus went for an op two days before. yup. now listening to a huge varity of songs. hahs.. jie lun.. elva.. jolin.. bob carslie.. michelle branch..celine doin.. hahs.. and many many more. i think abt 20 over diff singer.. nice! going off le ba. listen to music. chao. Dont write me off just yet,7:52 PM wahaaa.. jus had my piano lesson. yeppx. wasnt too bad. but i made SO MANY MISTAKES on my theory! whoops! hahs.. and im starving now. and tiredas well. *yawn*

later going to find eden at her skool. bleahh.. stupid girl. mus go her skool summore. den later haf to follow her duno go where den we can go lot 1. hahs.. oi den! i "xi sheng" a lot for u leii! hahs... actually jack and shawn were suppose to cum as well de. but hahs.. shawn wasnt allowed{no surprise} , and jack? why he cannot cum? i also duno.

lol. actually out of all my pri skool frens, onli eden has stayed as my close CLOSE fren. hahs.. we still spend hours on e fone wif each other like last time. e others? still close la. jus dun contact so often. but i still love them. =)

manage to catch up wif shawn abit. havent talked to him for sum time. wahahs.. but as usual, his sister intercepted. blahaha.. poor thing actually him, i think he's in a worse plight then me. everytime use fone will be in trouble. heh.. havent seen him for almost 1 year le. reason: his mum. =p

yup. soooooooooo hungry. but goin to resist temptation and eat later. cos im totaly and utterly broke. gotta eat brekkie at hme, and i'll try to eat and make myself full. so i wun haf to buy food later. hmmz.. dun wan to take too much $$ frm dad. e op for sis alr quite $$ le. feel bad.

hmmz.. yarpx. kinda tired now. going to rest. byes.. Dont write me off just yet,11:37 AM jus got hme. had to go to skool in e early morning. got on a big bus wen got there to st andrews cathedral. yup. cherry reached there right on e dot. hahs.. nearly too late. e thanksgiving service was surprisingly quite enjoyable. hahs.. everyone tot that it wld be real boring.

hehe.. i guess it was boring for most peeps. i din find e tad way thou. we started out wif jus waiting and waiting and waiting.. snore.. hahs.. den finally started by singing e school hyme.. blah blahh.. praise and worship came next and it was so COOL. i havent felt God's presence in such a long time. i jus felt like dancing in tad small space tad i had. wahahs.. cherry leaned over and said "aiyo.. wad's wrong wif u?". lol.. i laughed and said tad i felt like dancing. hahs.. she understood. =))

heh.. yup. guess ive been feeling real dry lately. as in, i cldnt feel God much and i was always distracted frm many things to care much abt Him. i din make him the center of my life. felt so at lost last night. den hamz told me tad this might jus be e season where i may feel dry, but said not to worry and jus pray more and i'll be able to break out of it. hahs.. does tad make sense to you? i cant rely translate an sms to a narrative. =p hahs.. but things are gettting better alr. i rely enjoyed praising God today. and i felt his presence, sumthin i havent felt in a long long time.PTL!=))

after e service we jus sang e scho song prayed.. blah blah. den we were dismissed. cherry, me, elizabeth, grace, dalvingit and leanne went for lunch together[tricia din come today]. hahs.. we found out that we had a shortage of money to buy ourselves a decent meal. waha.. but we came out wif e idea of pooling our money and we bought a BIG pizza at "pizza place" and shared. also had more den enough money to buy a drink from ntuc for everyone. e pizza place peeps were real nice! hahs.. e guy allowed us to bring e drinks in even thou we were not suppose to, he said "i shall close my eyes". hee.. and he joked wif us a lot. hahs.. had fun.

later after tad i went to e mrt station to wait for crisp cos he was going to pass me e cd wif hillsong songs in it tad he burnt for me. hahs.. made me wait for more den ONE HOUR. hahs.. cos of him i had to keep calling my piano teacher to push back our lesson time. in e end i told mummy and she said i sld jus change my lesson to tml. ahhs! so ma lu! i felt so pai seh wen i had to call me teacher again to tell her tad i wanted to change AGAIN. hahs.. so ya. my lesson will be at 10a.m tml morning.. *snore..*

yup. hahas.. wen he FINALLY CAME after MORE THEN ONE HOUR, den i go hme le. took e same train. but i made him pei me till chua chu kang cos i had to wait for him for SO LONG. wahaha.. used him fone and put in loads of REMINDERS! hahas.. hope he gets nice surprises wen his fone rings to remind him of stuff tad he doesnt need to know! hee.. im so evil! but den.. he knows tad i did tad. =p

used his fone to call desiree! my goodness! she was rely at hme! wahahas.. chatted wif her with HIS HP! hahs.. bully him. weeheehee.. nice to talk to her again. it's been a long time since i caught up wif her. hahs.. mayb i'll try to meet up wif her soon.

hahs.. yep. im jus so happie. dun ask me why. the joy of the lord is with me. thank you so much jesus! i love you so much! hahs.. im walking out of this dry period, step by step. jus feel so at peace. hahs.. but i wana jump! i want to dance man! =))

you didnt leave me =)) Dont write me off just yet,5:05 PM

a beautiful morning once again. woke up real late cos last night sis and i stayed up watching LEGALLY BLONDE.hahs.. quite a nice show rely, made me laugh like siao. munched on popcorns. yum! =)

my voice is going once again. better get well SOON! MUS get well! flu still haf la. but not as badd as at first. *sniff*







arghhh! i am SO going crazy. SPLT ENDS!! my split ends are back!! tot i chopped all of them off alr?? bleahh.. why mus they come back to huaunt me!!?? bleahh.. my hair is dropping off too! hahs.. am i going to die or something? lol.. ive been feeling "weird" these few days. [[define weird]] hahs.. mood swings for no apparent reason i'll state to say. mayb its jus cos im sick.


later going to JEC to meet gug, vivian n vina. den going to e library wif them. think i'll haf to borrow sis's card cos i alr borrowed 8 books on mine. hahs.. she doesnt even borrow books anywae. jus mags.

well.. gotta go eat lunch leii.. blog wen im back. chao.



Dont write me off just yet,1:00 PM i jus recieved this mail:

You are Everything To Somebody Right

now at this very minute. .

someone is very proud of you

someone is thinking of you

someone cares about you

someone misses you

someone wants to talk to you

someone wants to be with you

someone hopes you aren't in trouble

someone is thankful for the support you have provided

someone wants to hold your hand

someone hopes everything turns out all right

someone wants you to be happy

someone wants you to find them

someone is celebrating your successes

someone wants to give you a gift

someone think you ARE a gift

someone hopes you are not too cold, or too hot

someone wants to hug you

someone loves you

someone wants to lavish you with small gifts

someone admires your strength

someone is thinking of you and smiling

someone wants to be your shoulder to cry on

someone wants to go out with you and have a lot of fun

someone thinks the world of you

someone wants to protect you

someone would do anything for you

someone wants to be forgiven

someone is grateful for your forgiveness

someone wants to laugh with you about old times

someone remembers you and wishes you were there

someone is praising God for you

someone needs to know that your love is unconditional

somebody values your advice

someone wants to tell you how much they care

someone wants to stay up watching old movies with you

someone wants to share their dreams with you

someone wants to hold you in their arms

someone wants YOU to hold them in your arms

someone treasures your spirit

someone wishes they could STOP time because of you

someone praises God for your friendship and love

someone can't wait to see you

someone wishes that things didn't have to change

someone loves you for who you are

someone loves the way you make them feel

someone wants to be with you

someone is hoping they can grow old with you

someone hears a song that reminds them of you

someone wants you to know they are there for you

someone is glad that you're their friend someone wants to be your friend

someone stayed up all night thinking about you

someone is alive because of you

someone is remorseful after losing your friendship

someone is wishing that you would notice them

someone wants to get to know you better

someone believes that you are their soul mate

someone wants to be near you

someone misses your guidance and advice someone values your guidance and advice

someone has faith in you

someone trusts you someone needs you to send them this letter

someone needs your support

someone needs you to have faith in them

someone needs you to let them be your friend

someone will cry when they read this

all i can say is that people sldnt send those things when they dont mean it and then expect people to pass it on! and i dont even think that its true! ya ya.. i am SO SURE that RIGHT NOW somebody is celebrating my sucess.. yea.. someone miss a whole night sleep thinking about ME. hahas.. get real kayy.

to whoever tad sent me this.. im so sorry, but life aint like tad. frens wont always be there for you. i will try to be there for you wen u need me, but i cant promise. open ur eyes and look around.. who can u RELY trust? Dont write me off just yet,7:46 PM

jus got hme. hahas.. had a semi-good time. hahas.. as in, it was good but not tad fantastic.. hahas.. know wad i mean? hahas.. forget it.. i dont even know how to explain. =p

went there, had lunch at macs. stuffed ourselves silly, read.. blahh.. took neoprints! super uber nicee! wahaha.. see?


after tad we walked around. went to clementi cos sis wanted to print fotos. sat in macs waiting for them to print. bought dec issue of teenage. read it there. got a paper cut cos of it. bleahh.. sat there for a long time.. oh yea! teenage mag is having another essay writing competition! wahaha.. but e title is more challenging than last year. hahas.. wonder if i sld join. think i wld be able to win like last year? hahas.. hope so. shall start brain storming now.=))

yup. hahas.. i think shall join e essay thingy again. hahas.. pray tad my work will be good enough! =)) Dont write me off just yet,4:55 PM wahaha.. im feeling better this morning. throat is still dry but my flu is better. =)) hahas.. had no choice but to get of e fone last night cos i had a sudden coughing fit. =p

yeppx. was in a horrible mood yest. fired it all at kor. bleahh.. but he made me feel better. hahs.. i so love kor, always makes me smile wen im angry. even if i throw it all at him. =p hahas.. thanks kor! hahas.. dont care if others dont care la. got jesus n you can le. =))

hahas.. later going to bugis junction wif sis. duno do wad but she said wanted to spend time wif me.. okayylo. hahas.. jus go.

sighh.. i still so tired... going to rest.. Dont write me off just yet,11:10 AM im going crazy. i dont know what to do. i ve tried to let go. im still trying. but all i end up is feeling unsettled. wad is wrong?

unexpressable feelings

help Dont write me off just yet,7:48 PM feel SICK. WHERE IS KORKOR??? called and sms him also never reply!! die until where alr? im dying here! where are you???? Dont write me off just yet,6:18 PM i HATE the way they think they know everything
i hate the smug look on their face
i hate the fact that i try hard but nothings happening
i hate the way things have to be
i hate the way after all this im still stranded
i hate it i hate it i HATE IT
i hate many things
but i cant give up on you

help me Dont write me off just yet,2:35 PM yay.. im getting better! hahas.. but came close to having a few fainting spells jus now. duno why, keep having the tendancy to faint now a days. bleahh.. my head kinda hurts too.

think im going back to my pri skool book crazy thing. hahas.. used to think that it was jus a phrase that i wld get over. but hahas.. guess reading is jus in my blood. in e middle of three books now. duno which to finish first, all too interesting! lol..

went for dim sum wif my ah yi jus now. den got hme.. blah blah. everyone went shopping but i din feel like it. so came hme wif dad. later going to ah yi hse for dinner.. lala.. i dont feel good.. Dont write me off just yet,2:22 PM yay.. im getting better! hahas.. but came close to having a few fainting spells jus now. duno why, keep having the tendancy to faint now a days. bleahh.. my head kinda hurts too.

think im going back to my pri skool book crazy thing. hahas.. used to think that it was jus a phrase that i wld get over. but hahas.. guess reading is jus in my blood. in e middle of three books now. duno which to finish first, all too interesting! lol..

went for dim sum wif my ah yi jus now. den got hme.. blah blah. everyone went shopping but i din feel like it. so came hme wif dad. later going to ah yi hse for dinner.. lala.. i dont feel good.. Dont write me off just yet,2:22 PM wahaha.. im starting to fall in love wif DAILY BREAD. reading it nearly everyday le. =))

taken from todayy's daily bread:

Do you fear that you may have strayed too far from God to be restored? He who saved and cares for you longs for your return. His arms are open in forgiveness and acceptance. He will never drive you away.

God's love is so amazing isnt it? His love jus has no limits. after all we've done to Him. reject him, curse him, blame him. etc. etc. He still loves us more then ever. how can you compare this with anything else on this world? its too amazing

ilu Dont write me off just yet,10:41 PM yes! i can finally get on e comp! wahahaa.. tried to come on this morning but there was something wrong wif e internet connection, by e time it was fixed mum alr woke up, din let me use e comp.

basically todayy i jus lazed around, played piano and helped mum to deco e hse for christmas. hse looks beautiful now, jus not totally finished yet. this christmas.. will be e first christmas spent without pog peeps. wonder how its gona be.

its been so long now. 5 months. still waiting..

show me ur plan Dont write me off just yet,7:26 PM bleahh.. sick sick sick. my cough and flu got worse. had fun at freya's hse todayy.. had hot dog buns for lunch and chips. talked, laughed.. chatted.. swam.. etcetc. but now im sick.. bleahh.. but shall not declare it. i FEEL SO WELL. even thou i feel hot, my head is spinning.. etc..etc. went to my ah yi's hse for dinner. love her so much. spent sum time wif her, den came hme. better catch up on a word of God. have been slackin on that for e past few days. =( Dont write me off just yet,10:40 PM blahahaaa.. im sooooooo super tired! din get to sleep much cos i spent e whole night blowing my nose and coughing like siao.. sobx.. my throat hurts like crazy. =( i need prayer! been having cough n flu for so long le! i need to recover! booo hooooo... tired...

gotta rush to freya's hse right after i finish using comp. bleahh.. cos i din know what time she wanted us to reach her hse.. lalala.. gotta go la.. blog later.. bye!

wahaha.. i think i wana change my skin again! =p Dont write me off just yet,11:10 AM wahaha.. do you like my new skin peeps?.
sis went out todayy, so got her to buy famous amos cookies for me! wahaha.. SO NICE! but so expensive! *xin tong* bleahh.. so little summore.. *pouts* hahas.. but nice nice nice!! =D

called merci to wish her HAPPIE BIRTHDAY. chatted wif her for sum time. talked abt loads of things. she's such an interesting person to talk to. ive nv rely talked to her in such depth until todayy. hahs.. she rely is nice to talk to. totally cool. =)) Dont write me off just yet,4:36 PM [[authentic beauty]] :

".....in every generation there seems to be a few young women who make another choice - a choice to follow their Prince [a.k.a God] into the boundless depths of a set apart existence. are YOU willing to be on of the few?"

hmmz.. am i ready? Dont write me off just yet,10:50 AM jus finished eating dinner. bleahh.. but had to wash up ALL the dishes.. not nice.. but hahas.. im still happie.. duno why. hee.. im rely loving e book tat elysia lent. wahaha.. so so inspirational! woots! i love books more den ever now! wahaha.. im loving it! =))

reflections

hmmz.. ya. this year is approaching its end now. hmmz.. i mus say that this year has changed my whole life completely. i got to know so many wonderful people. and i actually experienced God on my own. yet, ive experienced so many 'trials'. thinking back. these may not necessarly be bad. in fact, they may be jus blessings in disguises. through these 'trials' ive learnt many things and matured.

hmmz.. guess i have to change many parts of my life, and how i approach God.. hmmz.. i guess i rely have to let go of many many things that are in the way of me and God. cos i wana do something for Him. i wana carry His word on my lips where ever i go, i wan to be His reflector. [[shine with Your glory]] wahaha.. tats why i dont resent trials anymore. cos ''every great leader has to go through many trials''. wahaha! i wana be a great leader for you Jesus!

well. i know now. i cant have an intimate relationship with God if i dont try hard enough. i have to change my life around. im not going to try to fit Him into my life. im going to fit my life into what ive planned with Him. im not going to be a silent christian anymore. im gona keep telling people about God. im going to try to keep sowing seeds. and, im not going to keep quiet wen people mock me about being 'holy'. im going to enjoy being HOLY. cos God Himself is HOLY, so we as christians sld be HOLY right? =))

from now on. i want to let God be the center of my life. im going to learn to let go and let Him take over. hahas.. like in hamz's blog 'let go. let God'. wahaha.. yea. guess i mus rely let go of all that baggage that is still in me. and jus pass it all to God. hmmz.. im not quite there yet, but im going to do my best to work towards it la. =))

hmmz.. ya. so i jus wan to tell all my christian frens out there. yea, in your walk with God, there will always little stepping stones and and mayb even big boulders, esp when you've just started you walk. but dont give up okayy! jus hold on tight and cont. trusting in God! hmmz.. ya. in wat ever that happens, jus know that what has happened; happened for a reason and that God wants it to be like that. cos mayb he wants you to learn sumthing about it. and maybe by going through that, you'll be able to grow up faster and discover Him more.

hahas.. yup. cos being alone in these trials can be tiring. but they will teach u and challenge you to lean on God and His wisdom, and not by your own understanding. so ya. jus remember 'He has promised never to leave you nor forsake you.'. love you peeps! =))

amen

lily white-likeness - thats what i want to be

set apart for you

`i let you pen my life now

Dont write me off just yet,8:00 PM meeee woke up late again todayy. hahas.. duno why. woke up lyk five times but jus din wan to get out of bed. hee.. now im having a headach over my piano hw! ohh jesus! how to do??? i always forget by the time its this time of the week! jesus.. please help me! piano lesson was pushed in front to 4p.m! *cries*

badd news! cant go to watch cherry at e xiao yuan superstar! cant go to watch e 'world of imagination' either! sobx.. cos on tat dayy we'll be leaving to malaysia wif gugu.. bleahh.. why cldnt we leave like.. on e 2oth? sadd..

yeppx. had a nice time wif elysia yest la. we ate and talked alot. its so interesting talking to her. hmmz.. ya. talked abt loads of things. God, e rapture.. blah blahh.. etc. she lent us a book too! it's rely interesting. its called 'autenthic beauty'. hahas.. a christian lady wrote it.[[leslie ludy]] hahas.. its rely inspirational but easy read. bleahh.. but it rely challenges me. read abt 4 chaps last night.rely like it. learnt loads frm it. guess i haf to let go of many many things. clear them away. =))

move on Dont write me off just yet,12:43 PM wahahaaaaaaa.. i haf never woke up so late before! lolx.. todayy was the first time ive ever slept till 12p.m! lolx.. hehe.. cos was up real late last night. alone in my room. cldnt sleep. so chatted wif crisp until about 3a.m plus? wahaha.. ya. den finally.. rely felt tired den went to sleep le lo. blahahahahah

hahas ya. so bored now. haf to go do my piano hw later, den go practice piano. hahas.. i cant seem to get out of this habit. doing my hw last min i mean.. wahaha.. i sld try changing.. =p

hmmz.. so todayy sld be a boring dayy ba. except tat later going to jurong point wif sis to meet elysia. yeppx. haf dinner there, walk walk. bleahh.. duno wad we're gona do..

lala.. yarpx.. duno wad to say le.. todayy nothing much.. blog later ba.. chaox Dont write me off just yet,12:42 PM woahh.. its such a hot dayy today. almost cant stand it le. pheww.. todayy dad summore turned off my air con, and din turn on the fan! woke up sweating.. bleahh..

hahas.. ya. was so tired yest tat i din rely blog abt wad rely happened. hahas.. tat day at east coast. yeppx. we jus hung around at macs, ate dinner, chatted.. blahh blahh.. den went to walk walk, sat on e rocks at the beach. tat was real nice, love sitting down there. hahas.. crapped alot la. hmmmz.. ya. we din do much la. lyk tat den later left le lo. hahas.. but had fun.

yest. wen we went to pog. hahas.. saw dominick and nick! hehe.. they're soooooo cute!weeheehee.. domi hugged! wahaha.. he din forget me! =)) was rely touched wen i talked to sum peeps la. caught up wif sum pple tat i havent talked to fer sum time, pastor julie, aunty jenifer, etc. they're such nice peeps. i rely felt touched wen they told me that they were praying for my family etc. yeppx. rely love them loads

wahaha.. ya. todayy.. played loads of piano.[[bleahh]] i love e piano but i so do NOT wan it to take over my life kayy.. siian.. accompanied mummie to e doctor's.[[she's on mc]] den helped her to bake cake.. hmmz.. watched liu xing hua yuan while eating lunch. fold clothes.. play piano again.. den go downstairs to buy sugar for mummy. chatted wif faith n esther. hahas.. and now using comp lo. wahaha.. wad a boring dayy.. lala..

jus a lil more time is wad i ask for
jus a lil more time and we can open a closed door
jus a lil more time and we can solve it all
but u dont understand
u dont mean to be selfish
but u've got to understand
one day
one day you'll understand..


ihope

PRAY

faith is not knowing that God can. its knowing that God WILL. Dont write me off just yet,2:57 PM so i told myself
im gona be okayy
i have to be okay
i am okay
no matter what happens
i have to hold on
dont give up
press on
everything's going to be fine
soon..

-right God? Dont write me off just yet,9:02 PM wahaha.. God is so good. he always apeases me and reminds me to control my temper jus wen im about to blow real big. woahh.. thanks god! yeppx.. got another mail too. i rely lyked it loads. actually wasnt sent to me, it was sent to my parent's joint e-mail, aunty catherine sent it and i happened to see la. hee.. i rely lyked it. shall share it wif u all.


Ben Stein's Last Column... For many years Ben Stein has written a biweekly column called "Monday Night At Morton's." (Morton's is a famous chain of Steakhouses known to be frequented by movie stars and famous people from around the globe.) Now, Ben is terminating the column to move on to other things in his life. Reading his final column is worth a few minutes of your time.
Ben Stein's Last Column... ============================================

How Can Someone Who Lives in Insane Luxury Be a Star in Today's World?
As I begin to write this, I "slug" it, as we writers say, which means I put a heading on top of the document to identify it. This heading is "eonlineFINAL," and it gives me
a shiver to write it. I have been doing this column for so long that I cannot even recall when I started. I loved writing this column so much for so long I came to believe it
would never end.

It worked well for a long time, but gradually, my changing as a person and the world's change have overtaken it. On a small scale, Morton's, while better than ever, no longer attracts as many stars as it used to. It still brings in the rich people in droves and definitely some stars. I saw Samuel L. Jackson there a few days ago, and we had a nice visit, and right before that, I saw and had a splendid talk with Warren Beatty in an elevator, in which we agreed that Splendor in the Grass was a super movie. But Morton's is not the star galaxy it once was, though it probably will be again.

Beyond that, a bigger change has happened. I no longer think Hollywood stars are terribly important. They are uniformly pleasant, friendly people, and they treat me better than I deserve to be treated. But a man or woman who makes a huge wage for memorizing lines and reciting them in front of a camera is no longer my idea of a shining star we should all look up to.

How can a man or woman who makes an eight-figure wage and lives in insane luxury really be a star in today's world, if by a "star" we mean someone bright and powerful and attractive as a role model? Real stars are not riding around in the backs of limousines or in Porsches or getting trained in yoga or Pilates and eating only raw fruit while they have Vietnamese girls do their nails.

They can be interesting, nice people, but they are not heroes to me any longer. A real star is the soldier of the 4th Infantry Division who poked his head into a hole on a
farm near Tikrit, Iraq. He could have been met by a bomb or a hail of AK-47 bullets.
Instead, he faced an abject Saddam Hussein and the gratitude of all of the decent people of the world.

A real star is the U.S. soldier who was sent to disarm a bomb next to a road north of Baghdad. He approached it, and the bomb went off and killed him. A real star, the kind who haunts my memory night and day, is the U.S. soldier in Baghdad who saw a little girl playing with a piece of unexploded ordnance on a street near wherehe was guarding a station. He pushed her aside and threw himself on it just as it exploded. He left a family desolate in California and a little girl alive in Baghdad.

The stars who deserve media attention are not the ones who have lavish weddings on TV but the ones who patrol the streets of Mosul even after two of their buddies were
murdered and their bodies battered and stripped for the sin of trying to protect Iraqis from terrorists.

We put couples with incomes of $100 million a year on the covers of our magazines. The noncoms and officers who barely scrape by on military pay but stand on guard in Afghanistan and Iraq and on ships and in submarines and near the Arctic Circle are anonymous as they live and die.

I am no longer comfortable being a part of the system that has such poor values, and I do not want to perpetuate those values by pretending that who is eating at Morton's is a big subject. There are plenty of other stars in the American firmament...the policemen and women who go off on patrol in South Central and have no idea if they will return alive; the orderlies and paramedics who bring in people who have been in terrible accidents and prepare them for surgery; the teachers and nurses who throw their whole spirits into caring for autistic children; the kind men and women who work in hospices and in cancer wards.

Think of each and every fireman who was running up the stairs at the World Trade Center as the towers began to collapse. Now you have my idea of a real hero.
I came to realize that life lived to help others is the only one that matters. This is my highest and best use as a human. I can put it another way.

Years ago, I realized Icould never be as great an actor as Olivier or as good a comic as Steve Martin...or Martin Mull or Fred Willard--or as good an economist as Samuelson or Friedman or as good a writer as Fitzgerald. Or even remotely close to any of them. But I could be a devoted father to my son, husband to my wife and, above all, a good son to the parents who had done so much for me.

This came to be my main task in life. I did it moderately well with my son, pretty well with my wife and well indeed with my parents (with my sister's help). I cared for and paid attention to them in their declining years. I stayed with my father as he got sick, went into extremis and then into a coma and then entered immortality with my sister and me reading him the Psalms.

This was the only point at which my life touched the lives of the soldiers in Iraq or the firefighters in New York. I came to realize that life lived to help others is the only one that matters and that it is my duty, in return for the lavish life God has devolved upon me, to help others He has placed in my path. This is my highest and best use as a human.
Faith is not believing that God can. It is knowing that God will.

By Ben Stein

hmmz.. this might not been much to sum peeps but it rely meant alot to me. i jus knew that God was speaking to me again. yeppx. i was alr blown away by the title 'Faith is not believing that God can. It is knowing that God will.' that encouraged me. loads. =))

`God speaks

Dont write me off just yet,7:17 PM jus got hme. went to orchard. yeppx. mum went to haf brunch wif my ah yi they all. bleahh.. so me, vivian n vina jus walk walk around lo. hee.. tou tou went to THE HOTEL. wahaha.. most of u will know wad im talking abt. weeheehee.. was kinda happie to see sum of e peeps la. cools.. =))

yarpx.. so drained out by those two. esp vina.. hahas.. hardly got time to breathe wif dem around.. vina keep disturbing vivian, making her irritated.. den dey quarrell... blah blahh.. ahhh! and she keep torturing my poor soft toys! wahh lau.. all collecter's items leii! all let her pull here drag there... poor things! my sis? no comment la. but she can rely be such a pain sum times.. she was such a bitch to me jus now. bleahh.. pardon my language. but im pissed okayys.

bleahh.. yea. dey're going hme later in the night.. havent had much sleep for e past few nights. feel so tired, but its okayy la. i dun want to sleep. cant sleep anywae.

these childish notions
these childish ideas
these childish reactions
these child like feelings
they have to go
they all have to go
i wont allow them to stay
they have togo away
cos there's no room for childish behaivours
there's no time for nonsense
need to grow up fast
else im gona get hurt over and over again
its time to change

`change Dont write me off just yet,4:03 PM wahaha.. now at macs wif hamz, cher , faith n vivian, vina. hee.. jus crapping .din know tat macs had comps. hehe.. bback later. chao Dont write me off just yet,6:51 PM wahaha.. now vina n vivian are at our hse. painted flowers on my toes jus now. den helped vivian too. hahas.. jus rotting at hme. later going to east coast ta meet sum of dem. yeppx.. feel kinda siian now.. bleahh..

hey.. im sorry. dont be angry le kay? Dont write me off just yet,2:55 PM lalalaaa.. i feel so tired. was very sleepy last night but slept late. bleahh.. so tired le.. but cldnt sleep cos i kept coughing. bleahh.. siianx.. tat kept me awake for like wad..?2 hrs? den finally fell asleep. but at 7 plus the fone rang.. arghh.. jus kept ringing and ringing, nobody pick up. so i answered.. was mum, wanted me to close the windows cos it was raining. siianx.. had troubles sleeping again. but den one time sleep, sleep all the way to 10:40a.m like tat. wahaha.

looking forwards to meeting gugu later. wahaha.. miss vivian and vina. hehe.. i STILL havent started on my hol hw! guilty.. but haiis.. no mood to do la.. not in my studious temprement now. bleahh.. hahas..

byes Dont write me off just yet,11:08 AM me now at my ah yi's hse. yeppx. jus now went o aunty jasmine's hse. jus hanged there, watched tv, chatted. hahas.. yea. borrowed e book tat iwanted to borrow. the one wif all e notes for loads of contemporary christian songs. nice sia! =)) hahas.. i rely love the songs in it. wahaha.. recently, ive fallen in love wif jay chou's 'long juan feng' too! wahahaha.. nice leii! hehe..

woots! my grandma's going to go to church! attending sum hokkien chrisitian service that sumone told her abt. heard tat most of her fren were converted too, thats how she got ministered and got touched! woots! revival is here! amen!

God will make a way
when there seems to be no way
He works in ways we cannot see
He will make a way for me
He will be my guide
hold me closely to His side
with love and strength
for each new day
He will make a way
By a roadway in the wilderness
He'll lead me
and rivers in the desert will I see
Heaven and earth will fade
but His Word will still remain
He will do something new today.

`He will make a way Dont write me off just yet,7:00 PM beautiful day todayy. not as hot as yest, but nice and cool. yarpx. happies. later going to aunty jill/jasmin's hse. hahas.. yarpx. can finally see the khoos again. lolx.. its been a long time sinceive seen them. lolx. will be cool to hang wif them again. yeas. tml going out wif gugu. wahaha.. i think she's bringing us out to try some special jap icecream or sumthing. lolx. coool. hahas.. rely haf nothing much to sayy today. oh well. blog again later. byes.

stuck in this trashed-up world
so im begging you to be my escape
this life sentance im serving
i admit im every bit deserving
but its the beauty of grace that makes life unfair

`i thank God Dont write me off just yet,10:43 AM me:
ohh WOW! jus wanted to say THANKS again aunty gwen!
=))
Gwen:
U are most welcome !
stay focus on Jesus !
me:
:D! thank you so mmuch!
i love you aunty gwen!
Gwen:
I love you too ... Alyssa !
me:
:D
Gwen
I saw the many giftings that God placed in your life and thousands of lives you are reaching out for Jesus !
me:
wow!
Gwen:
I saw it ... and it takes time to develop it.
me:
hmmz.. yes.
im still waiting to know what is my calling
cos someone once told me 'everyone is called. but only a few are chosen'
i hope im chosen!
*cross fingers*
Honey --- you are called and chosen period.
No 2nd thought !
me:
wow..!
Gwen:
It's confirmed.
me:
rely?
Gwen:
Just remember - .....
it's period.
me:
hey, i rely gotta go now. call u later?
Gwen:
will talk again
bye

wahaha.. now im even MORE excited! i was like WOW. am i rely chosen? im so excited! me?! wow! i dont know wad God has in store for me. but im jus going to continue believing. yay! i wana do great things fer u lord! =))

`renewed strength Dont write me off just yet,7:47 PM ohmygosh! this is SO unreal! wahaha.. im so excited! like im so fired up again! woo hoo! forget abt my last post! weeheehee! i feel like myself again! lalalala.. im so excited! lala!

woah.. this rely shows that God is rely beautiful in his time, and super accurate! wow! right after i published that depressing post, i got a word! so cool right! God rely is so good! got my word from aunty gwen! hehe.. that rely shows me that God does care, and he rely is listening to me. im so exciteed!

i was chattin tuh aunty gwen on msn. and she said..

hehe.. yeas..

me:
u've been busy lately?
Gwen:
yes, i've been since I landed at MAPS.l
me:
hahas
me:
but u seem even busier den usual
Gwen:
meeting up with various clients ... and it has been nice and fun and most of all - very much satisfaction ...
me:
hehe.. tats great!
Gwen:
I love my job and ministry in the Lord !
me:
=))
Gwen:
But I still want to be able to make time just for you ....
me:
hehe..
:D
Gwen:
I want to keep my promise ...
Gwen:
like right now ...
me:
yay!
Gwen:
I can't talk cas' there's someone in the same room as me ...
me:
hahas. sure
Gwen:
I need to be working now ...
me:
uh huh
Gwen:
so I msn lah !
thank God for such technology ...
ha !
me:
*grins*
hehe
yeppx!
Gwen:
I love you big time and you are precious to me and to God.
I believe in you and so does God.
me:
i love you too aunty gwen!
Gwen:
You made u for very specific purpose ...
God does not change His mind at all.
He is determined to allow and ensure His plan goes through no matter what matter.
no matter what happen.
me:
wow.. [[like so gong like tat. lolx. =p]]
Gwen:
What God opens, men can never shut.
me:
yay!
Gwen:
What God close, men cannot open.
U are one mighty young lady of God - and honey - you got to learn to keep that fire of God burning inside of you.
Understand ....
U ain't going to die, but you shall live to glorify the Name of our God.
God made you to be the head not never the tail.
me:
amen!
:D:D
Gwen:
Don't give up and don't give in to temptations of this world in term of your feeling, your thoughts patterns, etc.
No one quits for such a time like this ...
NO ONE QUITS ...... for a time like this cas' God never quit on you ....
me:
wow..
Gwen:
Alyssa ... God said - Get up and Get out to fight a good fight of faith ...
Common on ... girl !
U go .... girl
I love you big time ....
me:
hmmz.. thanks! [[dazed already]]
Gwen:
no matter how busy I am and how busy I get ... I will make time for you ...
me:
you dont know how much that meant to me aunty gwen!
Gwen:
I gave you my words and I will keep it.
me:
i;ve been waiting for a word for a LONG TIME!
Gwen:
We had not stop praying for you and your family ....
me:
i know. thank you!
Gwen:
amen !
me:
=D
god rely is wonderful in his time
Gwen:
yes ... God is never early, God is never late, He always right on time.
Remember - God knows ....
Gwen :
Told you - you are a very special child of God ...
me:
hmmz..yeas
Gwen:
He never, ever forsake you at all - though men can make mistake and change the plan of God ... but u got to keep praying and believing ...
me:
yepp
Gwen:
Keep declaring the promises of God in your life ... amen !
can I call you at your hp and pray for u?
me:
yea!
Gwen:
now ....
me:
sure

hahas.. im so long winded right? lolx.. but cant help it la. im overjoyed! hahas.. wad she said rely encouraged me. hmmz.. she said loads of things wen she prayed fer me too. hmmz.. she said

'God had big plans fer you, and these little stuff are just tests to see if u've learnt anything. to use what u've learnt in the sermons u've attended. u're going to rise up and bring the word of God wherever u go and declare the promises of God. you will never be alone for the footprints in the sand shows only one pair where He has been carrying you throughout. you will be a mighty women of God. and will shine bright. your purity will penetrate through the dark and with God by your side, you will NEVER compromise to the devil and when you call upon the angels they will come and help you in what u need help in. you will never allow condenmation, whether it is fro mthe devil or from man. i pray that what is left, even if its jus a little spark, will go a long way, because a spark can turn into a fire. and you will have protection. you will be protected and satan cant harm you if you dont let him decieve you because Jesus took the price at the cross for you. favour is upon you. and the favour will increase. mercy and favour will follow you throughout all things. protect your destiny Alyssa. protect what is yours. do not let the devil rob you. you will shine for the lord. God has many wonderful plans for you. you are a very special child and i can feel the annionting jus as i speak. so protect ur destiny....' etc..

is that COOL or what? my gosh.. my head is still spinning! woahh.. im so excited!! ohh God!! thank you SO MUCH! thank God for aunty gwen! woo hooo..! i love you jesus! thanks for not giving up n me when i nearly gave up on you. thank you for loving me. THANK YOU.

`you didnt leave me Dont write me off just yet,4:37 PM i feel alone. feel so horribly alone. im sorry. but sometimes i just cant feel you anymore. i cant feel your peace sometimes. im sorry. maybe im not seeking you in the right way. maybe i havent let go of things that you want me to let go of. i dont even know what you want me to let go of. i need a word. i need a word from you. cos at times im just lost. lost in myself. i dont know if i should let go and carry on, or hold on and hope that things will be the same soon. i dont know what is right. i dont know what you want for me. to trust you that things will go back. or whether you want me to move on in another direction, what do you want for me lord?

tell me Dont write me off just yet,3:29 PM heys! im back after a one dayy break. spent the whole morning packing all my skool books. ones tat i haf to keep ones that i haf to throw away.. blah blahh.. was SO HOT okayy. in the studyrrom for more den 2 hrs. phew! lucky i finish liao..

yest had fun at east coast. even thou din do much la. barbaqued.. ate.. swinged in the hammock. talked. laughed. hahas.. still got wad? jus hung around eating laughing n playing. den went to e arcade wif alex, vivian, vina and my sis lo. hahas.. ya. den vivan vina came to my hse. hmmz.. rested. chatted wif faith and hamz fer abt wad..? one hour or so? lolx.. ya. vivian vina keep complaining tat i on the fone so long nv play wif them. hee..

yarpx. den we went out, met my gugu for dinner. went to chervon. played the free x box game there. den went to e arcade to play e music game thingayye. and e duno wad game la. vivian dey all like to play one. hahas.. arcades arent rely my thing, but i dun mind dem la. last time play till sian. lolx..

hmmz.. later still gota complete all my piano hw! got so much to do! lolx.. later got piano again. so hmmz.. shall complete my work.. practice abit den rest ba.. havent had much sleep the past few days. think.. will do it abt 3p.m like tat.

`who's gona be there fer me? Dont write me off just yet,1:20 PM